Social Media, Buddhism and a New Identity Crisis

Social media has become the lifeblood of our society, making it more pressing and necessary to consider just how constructive it is. Judging by screen time alone, we would find that as a whole social media leaves much to be desired. Sadly, screen time is the tip of the iceberg of adverse impacts that social platforms have on their users. This impact iceberg is mental illness, anxiety and emotional distress all mixed together to form one big Titanic sinker. Instead of building grit and confidence, we as a society have become addicts of comparison; consistently scrolling and constantly distracted. One of the so-called benefits of social media is that it allows us the opportunity to find our voices and establish our identity. However, I would argue that social media’s role in solidifying and establishing our identities is in itself a potential problem worth exploring, even though this stands in stark contrast to the entire ethos of the 21st century, a time of radical individualism in which we are encouraged at every turn to find, nurture, and hold tightly to our own identities.

When you first sign up to Instagram, for example, you are encouraged to fill out a bio and tell the world a little bit about yourself. Then as your photo diary populates your profile, who you are becomes increasingly defined to the world around you and, indeed, to yourself. While this is hardly an issue when you are using your account twice a month, unfortunately the statistics suggest otherwise, with usage time of social media platforms averaging at 145 minutes per day for users across the world in 2020, notwithstanding the increased usage brought about by the pandemic. What exacerbates the issue is the fact that the you we are putting out to the world is a facade. I would argue that it is almost impossible to be fully authentic on social media because the very nature of it requires curation, thought and processing before putting something out there.

In other words, we spend hours every day curating an identity that isn’t even truly our own. We become defined by the things we have done, the people we interact with, the places we go and how we portray all of this on social media. Not only this, we also fall prey to the problem of comparison. This social comparison – the process of evaluating ourselves, our inner and outer worlds against others – is a phenomenon intrinsic to human nature and is by no means unique to social media. However, never before in history have we been flooded with the limitless opportunity to engage in social comparison due to the accessibility of platforms and sheer magnitude of potential comparisons that can be made.

So the problem is threefold:

1. We define ourselves and develop our identities within social media
2. Moreover, we define ourselves incorrectly because of the limited and curated nature of social media
3. We then engage in social comparison and judge our own identity against the identities of others on social media

This whole cycle of defining, developing and judging our identities serves to solidify who we think we are. We are the words we have posted and the comments we have made. Who we are is laid out in a mixture of a grid of photographs of our own curation, as well as the photographs we are tagged in. We are the connections we establish; more often than not judged based on quantity over quality. We are similar to some and different to others. The more time we spend on these platforms, feeding this proverbial beast, the more defined becomes our self-identity.

So what’s the issue?

I believe that there is something that we can learn from Buddhist philosophy, which teaches that suffering arises out of a preoccupation with identity. The ultimate goal of Buddhism is to elevate into collective consciousness and let go the holds we have on our own ego and on material things.

” Buddhism holds that personal identity is delusional, that each of us is a self that turns out to not actually exist. Clinging to or being obsessed with the delusional self is the major cause of suffering.”

Buddhist teachings stand in stark contrast to the world we live in; a world dominated by social media. Where social media facilitates the curation and establishment of our identities, pitting us against one another through social comparison, Buddhist practices and teachings seek to facilitate the removal of any form of ‘self’ and awaken to the true nature of life: that we do not exist as separate entities. We cause ourselves pain by holding on too tightly to our false identities, having to justify them, protect them and do all we can to prevent their loss.

The past year has revealed to me the extent of this problem of identity and suffering, and I believe that we as a species may have coped better with Covid were we not so attached to our own identities. Our routines, our jobs, our friends and the activities in which we engage (which, for many people are recorded and curated on social media) all serve to solidify our identities. However, when our lives are put on hold, our routines disrupted, our activities prevented and our friendships restricted, we are stripped bare of the things we thought made us who we are and left with something (perhaps) better approximating who we actually are.

If we are not the things we do, then who are we?

Covid, in many ways, gave us the opportunity to see what is left over by removing many of the illusions of our identities with which we live. But what if we were to to flip that on its head? What if, instead of activities and illusions being the definition of our identity, with an uncomfortable and unknown “true” nature left over, we become comfortable and grew to know that true nature, allowing instead for the activities and illusions to become the left overs? Would that not leave us in a more powerful position to adapt to changes, to roll with the punches and to be open to opportunities outside of the realm of who we think we are?

Unfortunately, social media does not serve us in this pursuit. Consequently, it truly needs to be used with caution. Now, I am not necessarily calling for a radical social media shut down, but rather for a movement of awareness that, I believe, would benefit us individually and as a society. Maybe the trick is to engage with the platform with a sense of humour and lightheartedness, not holding too tightly onto who you are portraying, or taking too seriously the dynamics of the community? Easier said than done! As I am still in the process of figuring this out for myself, I would love to engage with you on this. What do you think?